going LOCAL
Funny Vacations!
Posted:Jun 23, 2018 8:16 am
Last Updated:Jun 23, 2018 9:33 am
214 Views



Funny Vacations!


Airport:
A young couple are about to go on a vacation. The guy is waiting for his blonde girlfriend at the airport, when she arrives carrying a door.
BF: "What are you carrying?!"
GF: "You know how burglars break down the front door to get into houses?"
BF: "Yeah?"
GF: "Well, if I take my front door with me, then burglars can't break the door down, which means they can't get in and take anything."
BF: "Ok then. What are you going to do if you lose the door, or if the door breaks?"
GF: "I thought of that. I left one of the side windows open so I can get in through there."



Wonder Drug:
A man goes to his doctors and, twitching his fingers and stuttering, finally manages to say, "Doctor, I have a sexual performance problem. Can you help me?" "Oh, that's not a problem for us men anymore!" announces a proud physician, "They just came out with this new wonder Drug, Viagra, that does the trick! You take some pills, and your problems are history." So the doctor gives the man a prescription and sends him on his merry way. A couple of months later, the doctor runs into his patient on the street. "Doctor, Doctor!" exclaims the man excitedly, "I've got to thank you! This Drug is a miracle! It's wonderful!" "Well, I'm glad to hear that," says the pleased physician. "What does your wife think about it?" "Wife?" asks the man, "I haven't been home yet."


Summer Vacation Summer vacation was over and Little Johnny returned back to school. Only two days later his teacher phoned his mother to tell her that he was misbehaving. "Wait just a minute," she said. "I had Johnny with me for three months and I never called you once when he misbehaved!; couldn't you show me the same courtesy?"


Funny Vacations!
3 Comments
Sex Vacation!
Posted:Jun 23, 2018 8:15 am
Last Updated:Jun 23, 2018 9:36 am
213 Views



Sex Vacation!


Looking good and smelling good is very important when one goes on a sex vacation!



I have decided on my diet during my sex vacation!


Maybe, finally, I will get lucky and do a FMF on my sex vacation!

My wife has decided on her diet too!

She has decided on her daily exercise routine!

She told me that she is open to finally trying anal sex!

Butt you know how if you ever went on a sex vacation that the best of plans could very well fall short!


Sex Vacation!
2 Comments
On Vacation!
Posted:Jun 23, 2018 8:13 am
Last Updated:Jun 23, 2018 9:39 am
210 Views



On Vacation!


I am taking a break from blogging for two weeks!



I am going to Europe and plan to see all the sights!


Wish me well!


On Vacation!
4 Comments
Funny things happened on Friday on the way to the weekend!
Posted:Jun 22, 2018 10:21 am
Last Updated:Jun 22, 2018 3:48 pm
430 Views



Funny things happened on Friday on the way to the weekend!


Which day of the week you don't wear panties at all?



Do you go for it and grab what you want out of life?


If you do Friday right you always end up with a three day weekend!


Funny things happened on Friday on the way to the weekend!
6 Comments
Sloppy Bow Job Friday!
Posted:Jun 22, 2018 10:02 am
Last Updated:Jun 22, 2018 3:35 pm
460 Views



Sloppy Bow Job Friday!


What was the sloppiest blow job you ever gave?



Half of the fun and pleasure is the sloppy mess, don't you think?


Why do women with red ruby lips give sloppy blow jobs?


Sloppy Bow Job Friday!
11 Comments
Wear Fishnets this Friday or nothing all all!
Posted:Jun 22, 2018 9:29 am
Last Updated:Jun 22, 2018 3:11 pm
427 Views



Wear Fishnets this Friday or nothing all all!


Happy casual Friday all day at work!



How often do you wear fishnets?


Ask !you lover(s) to buy you a couple of sexy pairs and wear then and see how your sex life explodes into orgasms!


Wear Fishnets this Friday or nothing all all!
2 Comments
Summer Adult Camp for Funny Thursday!
Posted:Jun 21, 2018 5:23 am
Last Updated:Jun 21, 2018 7:40 am
665 Views



Summer Adult Camp for Funny Thursday!


Have you ever crashed a nudist camp?



A guy joined a nudist camp and when he told his mom she didn't believe him. So he sent her a picture of his top half. A week later his grandma wanted a picture but he accidently sent the bottom half. Knowing she had bad eyesight, he didn't think much of it.

A week later his grandma wrote a letter saying, that she didn't like his haircut, because it made his nose look too big.


Whatever you do have a funny Thursday everyone!
Have fun!


Summer Adult Camp for Funny Thursday!
7 Comments
Boots N leather Thursday!
Posted:Jun 21, 2018 5:07 am
Last Updated:Jun 21, 2018 5:19 am
632 Views



Boots N leather Thursday!


I like when my wife wears her leather boots to bed!
How about you?



She looks good in them and it turns me on like heck!


I will do all her holes ounce I am in an extremely horny worked up mood!
How about you?


Boots N leather Thursday!
5 Comments
Sexy Foreplay Thursday!
Posted:Jun 21, 2018 4:31 am
Last Updated:Jun 21, 2018 5:10 am
624 Views



Sexy Foreplay Thursday!


I know this is the age of fast food and all that!
We all what it now!
But, sex like baking, one needs to warm up the oven!



How long do you spend of foreplay with your lover(s)?


I like to tease and please and then after a while I move on to penetration instinctively, after I am so worked up I can't stand it any longer!


Sexy Foreplay Thursday!
3 Comments
Funny Wednesday!
Posted:Jun 20, 2018 7:46 am
Last Updated:Jun 20, 2018 4:35 pm
785 Views



Funny Wednesday!


Pricey Lingerie:
An almost blind guy walked into Lover's Lane to purchase their most see-through item for his wife. After receiving some help from the store clerk, he bought a lace teddy for $500 and brought it home for his wife to try on. She took it upstairs and realized that it didn't quite fit. But, she figured, since it's supposed to be see-through and since he's almost blind, she might as well wear nothing at all. So she came downstairs completely naked. "Huh," said the old man, hugging her. "For the amount I paid, they could've at least ironed the damn thing."



Making a Sandwich:
A teen was about to finish his senior year and he still lived with his 5 year old brother. He was going to bring his girlfriend over for a good time. He sleeps on a bunk bed with his little bro. He notice's his little bro is a sleep on the bottom bunk. He tells his girl friend whenever you want me to change position say lettuce whenever you want me to go faster say tomato. She agrees So they start Lettuce,tomato lettuce, tomato Ten the little bro. Wakes up and says "Stop making sandwiches your getting mayonnaise all over my face"


Women say us men only think with our penis.
Ladies, don't be afraid to blow our minds.


Funny Wednesday!
6 Comments
Group Sex Wednesday!
Posted:Jun 20, 2018 7:45 am
Last Updated:Jun 20, 2018 8:31 am
783 Views



Group Sex Wednesday!


Is hospitality important when you are hosting a group for sexy fun at your home?



In the future we may host group sex at our home!
How about you?


My wife loves more than one cock at a time!
How about your woman does she need more than one guy at the same time?


Group Sex Wednesday!
3 Comments
Happy Hump Day Wednesday!
Posted:Jun 20, 2018 7:15 am
Last Updated:Jun 21, 2018 7:14 am
782 Views



Happy Hump Day Wednesday!


I love wet pussy!



Most of us have to work hard for a living but with all that don't forget to have fun too!


It's the middle of the week again and I hope we all made it to to Hump Day Wednesday with greater wealth and health!


Happy Hump Day Wednesday!
4 Comments
Funny Tuesday!
Posted:Jun 19, 2018 7:20 am
Last Updated:Jun 19, 2018 8:32 am
1069 Views



Funny Tuesday!


Blueberry Hill There was a class going on and a girl walked in and the teacher said "Where have you been?." The girl said " I've been on blueberry hill. Five minutes later another girl walked in and she was too and the teacher asked" Where have you been?" The girl said I've been on blueberry hill. Five minutes later a naked boy walked in and the teacher says " Let me guess you've been on blueberry hill too?" then the he says" I am bluberry hill.

Editors Note: You can invert the sexes if you change the preposition from "on" blueberry hill to "in" in blueberry hill.



Missionary:
Whenever a baby was born to this outback African tribe it was cause for great celebration and merriment as the future of the tribe would continue to survive. However, on the last occasion there was a bit of concern as the baby was white and the only person around for 500 miles that was white was the missionary. The Chief calls him into his hut and explains the problem and highlights his accusation. The Missionary is put on the spot and slowly strokes his chin, thinking. " I see your dilemma Oh great Chief. Come with me. " They go outside and over to the sheep pen. "You see all these sheep here? They are all white except that one over there that's black. I'll do a deal with you. You don't say anything about the kid and I won't tell anyone about the sheep, okay ?"


Can't Beat It:

Which of the following doesn't belong?
A meat
B eggs
C wife
D blow job

(D) A blowjob, because its possible to beat your meat, your eggs or your wife, but you can't beat a blowjob!


Funny Tuesday!
4 Comments

To link to this blog (Apollorising2057) use [blog Apollorising2057] in your messages.

57 M
June 2018
Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat
          1
3
2
3
3
3
4
3
5
3
6
 
7
3
8
 
9
3
10
3
11
 
12
3
13
 
14
3
15
 
16
3
17
3
18
 
19
3
20
3
21
3
22
3
23
3
24
 
25
 
26
 
27
 
28
 
29
 
30
 

Recent Visitors

Visitor Age Sex Date
sws56 63/62C6/24
author51 55F6/24
REDHELLER2 53M6/24
vanjohnxx  49M6/24
passiondreamer13  33M6/24
partygald  35F6/24
Black_Teacher4U  33M6/23
DocG40 63M6/23
takeout42 62M6/23
Kimbra2525  48F6/23