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when you stop trying to grasp at things and just be , just do what you do for your own reasons that make you content .Others will find you .when you grasp it broadcasts neediness, and most folks do not want that in any way . My buddy can attract lots of messed up women who are sometimes pretty but mostly a mess .He tries to fix them make them what he thinks they should want to be in his way and he pisses them off and pushes them away when they open up and want him to open up . He does not think he is good enough and trusts no one since he has been burned by scammer flake women many times . He finally gave up reaching for hot sex ,and got comfy just living his way ,Now a very nice lady showed up .he has so far stayed cool and avoided running her of though he thought about it and tested her .She called him on his bull lol He may make it eventually practice makes perfect .patience is helpful .
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